Earlier this afternoon I stopped in to Ralph’s grocery store. Anyone who doesn’t live in southern California should know that Ralph’s is to California what Piggly Wiggly is to the South. Does that chain even exist? Isn’t it all Wal-Mart now? But I digress. I was in the 15 items or less checkout aisle. The woman in front of me had a basket full of food, but nobody said anything. I’m sure everyone can tell that story. The fun started as I was leaving Ralph’s. In order to explain what happened to the rest of the world that reads this blog (by the way, I’m glad you’re reading it, I enjoy writing it), we have something that goes on in the Los Angeles area that doesn’t happen anywhere else except here. We have opportunities to see movies for free. A lot of times when you leave a bank, grocery store or anywhere that has a ton of traffic, there’s usually someone with a clipboard offering a free movie. It’s only free monetarily. You pay for it in other ways. Here’s how it works…guy asks if you’d like to see a free movie first. Most people who live here brush him off at this point. For the stooge who says sure, the sign up process begins. You get to see what you think will be a free movie. It’s anything but. If it’s put out by the big studios, it’s generally not a finished product. They’re using you to judge what they should go back and change. There’s usually a big questionnaire to answer at the end. If it’s done by a small movie house (“indie” film) you can bet your ass you’re going to watch crap. As I exited the store, the guy asked me if I wanted to take my kids to the movies. As I was getting ready to brush him off, I thought better of it. I turned and I put one hand on each of his shoulders and said, “Kids? I have kids? I didn’t know. I know there was that spring break in 1982 but they wouldn’t be kids. Then there was that chick on Melrose, but I used a condom. Where are they? Sir, you made me the happiest man on the planet. I thought I was going to die single and alone.” At this point the guys eyes were as wide as they could possibly get. He started to back away so my hands would leave his shoulders. He was confused. I removed my hands, then turned and walked away. I told you that to tell you this. About three hours after that, I arrived home. I was whipping up some dinner and turned on the little television on the corner of my kitchen counter. There I saw Larry King. He’s been doing some final interviews. It looks like he’s finally going off the air. To be honest, I thought he had died 20 years ago. For the first time ever, I watched a Larry King interview. Not because it may be one of the last times we ever see the great Larry King, but more so because he was interviewing the great Al Pacino. He was asking all the usual questions about Scent of a Woman, Sea of Love and, of course the all-time best movie ever, The Godfather. I’ve been an Al Pacino fan pretty much my entire life. He’s to me what Marlon Brando was to the generation before me. When you think of the body of work this guy has, like Scarface, The Godfathers (If you think there are three Godfathers, you’re not a fan. I don’t know what that third thing was). I guess your big question is: What does this have to do with fitness? I have to be honest with you. It has nothing to do with fitness. It’s holiday time, and tonight, I didn’t feel like writing about fitness. So I did what every other idiotic blogger in the world does and just wrote about my day. In the interest of full disclosure, I’m having a glass of an Italian apple-flavored liquor that’s almost impossible to find in this country. I brought a couple of bottles back with me from Capri and I savor every drop. It’s called Melanu. Happy holidays.
