I’d like to start this blog by mentioning something sent to me on Facebook by one of my loyal readers. We’ll call her Angela Callahan because that’s her name. I grew up with Angela, she was like a sister to me. Her brother Big Daddy Callahan was one of my best friends. I always wished I had a name like Big Daddy Callahan. But I got stuck with Vinnie…Vinnie the Trainer. I’m a walking cliche of myself. But I digress. Angela wanted to thank me for a picture of Sophia Loren I put on one of my blogs. Sophia was sporting some extra thick legs. And Angela appreciated the fact that I’m not afraid to show real women. It’s often been said that the likes of Sophia Loren, Jayne Mansfield and Marilyn Monroe (to name a few) couldn’t make it in today’s world. They would all be considered, and I’m not kidding folks, too fat. I told you that to tell you this. As I write this, I’m looking at the cover of Prevention magazine. Of course they have a picture of a hot looking chick, maybe in her mid to late 30s. She’s exercising, walking next to a lake with a smile on her face. When I see women running down the street, they usually don’t have a smile on their face. When I look past the woman and read the cover, I see the lies perpetrated by a magazine that pretends to hold themselves higher than the average fitness rag. The first lie: Slim in four weeks! Really? You’re telling me if a woman is 5’2″ and 200 pounds she can be slim inside of a month? OK. Lie number two: Walk off a size now! What does that mean? Generally what I find with my female clients, a size can mean anywhere from eight to ten pounds. Can I lose that in one walk? Lie number three: 14 reader-tested routines that target stubborn fat. Really folks? I didn’t know you can burn fat from a certain area of your body. I’d say that is impossible, unless you took a steak knife and cut it off. That’s a lot like liposuction, which doesn’t work. Lie number four: Anti-aging products that really work. Does that mean if I use these products I won’t look 48? I can look 40, then 30, and eventually 3? Lie number five: 128 stay healthy discoveries. Is being healthy a discovery? Columbus finding the Americas and realizing the world isn’t flat…that’s a discovery. Maybe my favorite lie here: Can’t sleep? Snack on this! In the interest of full disclosure, I’ve tried this on Serena…didn’t work. OK, bad joke, but I’m leaving it in. The last thing a magazine that calls itself Prevention should tell anyone is to eat to fall asleep. The next lie…by the way, I’m on the cover of the magazine still…three new tummy tighteners. The only reason I mention this one is because it’s the worst English I’ve ever seen. And I’m from Cajun country, I know bad English. The most laughable one: The ultimate cancer defense. I actually opened the magazine and read through pieces of this work and have to tell you, I did most of those things most of my life and I almost died of cancer. Prevention is the perfect name for this magazine. You should “prevent” yourself from ever picking it up and reading it. Then again, the magazine is geared toward the Cougar group who go out Friday nights to a wine bar with the single purpose of being lied to.
